Wrecked by Beauty: Moving Out of Depression
It doesn’t matter where I go, He wrecks me with the beauty of His creation and attention to all the details of who I am. When I say “wrecks me” what I mean is He disrupts and dispels whatever negative thing overtakes me at any given moment.
You see, I have severe depression and PTSD. It’s a battle. Mix that with trauma and loss and grief over the last decade, and well, it’s not pretty. I don’t want to be heavily medicated, so I stay in constant prayer as well as consistent and frequent contact with my therapist and spiritual mentors. AND – as you probably already know – I chase beauty – alot.
And contrary to what you might think, sometimes I have to force myself to get in my car and go. I have to at least book the first non-refundable night which then requires me to pack a bag and hit the road. And once I’m out there, I’m thrilled and wooed as I revel in the spectacular beauty of His glorious creation.
God is interested in the most intricate details of our lives because He created us and wants relationship with us. He wows me every day. He takes care of me. He meets all my needs. He loves me. He’s healing my broken heart and body.
For some viewing these pics you may be thinking, “What’s the big deal?” But to me, they represent all the things I love that hold beauty and nostalgia for my life…rushing rivers, curvy mountain roads, fall leaves, crisp cool air, trains (I’ve lived near trains my entire life).
As I was rounding this curve, I thought, “What a perfect scene…everything I love…now if only a train would come by…that would be the cherry on top.” And sure enough, two minutes later, I heard the whistle blow and saw the smoke rise as it rounded the bend and started chugging along the river.
When’s the last time you booked a place more than an hour away and just drove to see what was out there? No agenda. No tours. No long stops. No shopping. Just driving, windows down, radio off, listening, watching, and purposely getting lost on a back road. It’s good for the soul. It heals. It lifts the spirits so you can return to whatever your normal looks like. And then when you feel those waves starting to crash again…book another beauty expedition. As many as it takes.